


The Light

by DanielleItLouderNow



Category: Xena: Warrior Princess
Genre: Drabble, F/F, Guilt, POV First Person, Prompt Fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-21
Updated: 2018-12-21
Packaged: 2019-09-23 23:45:32
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 342
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17090000
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DanielleItLouderNow/pseuds/DanielleItLouderNow
Summary: Short drabble of Gabrielle's thoughts set after the fight in the tavern between Xena and Najara.





	The Light

**Author's Note:**

> I watched the Crusader and pounded out a quick little drabble. I've been unable to really write in the last few months, so I'm kind of happy to have accomplished just this.
> 
> But I noticed that while Gabrielle may have been taken by or infatuated with Najara, the scenes in which she's looking between and talking to both Xena and Najara, Gabrielle's expressions hold such love for Xena.
> 
> Renee O'Connor always has and always will be one of my absolute favorite actresses, simply because of how well she conveys emotions. Not just with dialogue, but her whole being. I can also say without a doubt, she is one of the kindest individuals I have ever had the pleasure of interacting with.
> 
> So, thanks Ren, I suppose you inspired this fic in a way.
> 
> Enjoy all, feedback is always welcome and I reply to all comments as I can.
> 
> Cheers.

The floor tasted like a mixture of dirt and failure. I tried to choke back the tears constricting my throat. There was only one way out of this, and by the gods, did I pray it worked.

I never once thought when we walked into the dusty tavern that I'd find myself here, cowering over the limp body of my champion; the woman I'd spent many moons with who still viewed me as goodness and light, even after all of my shortcomings.

I heard the words leaving my lips but couldn't believe I was saying them.

"-- dark side frightens me. I need to move on, but I could never--," the words continue to tumble free while my eyes focus on both the woman towering above me, sword in hand, and the one below, bleeding and unconscious, murmuring incoherently. I think I hear my name spill from her lips and am instantly filled with regret.

My eyes flicker downward for only a moment, just a single moment, and my heart breaks at the sight of my warrior: battered, bruised, and bleeding. But the color of her blood is the least of my worries.

I curse myself for leaving my staff across the bar but I was convinced this was a fight I could only lose, a battle I could only fight with surrender.

I prayed that she would understand, that she would forgive me, that she would know I had to leave her to save her.  


But my heart still clenched at the thought of leaving my life with her behind. Everything I knew, everything I loved, everything I left unsaid.

Shame filled me as I stood, following the woman claiming such righteousness.

I cast one final glance back, questioning everything I thought I knew, the person who I longed to be, the aching in my chest as my eyes took in her final gift to me.

I prayed for rain to hide my tears and cleanse my soul of grief.

I find peace in the rain.

I find peace in the darkness.


End file.
